Pencil on paper
24" x 19"
Copyright Jane Rubin 2012
In real life, I only weighed 100 pounds when I drew this self-portrait. I was anorexic and emaciated. I added about 20 pounds to my body in the drawing to cover up my protruding skeleton and veins. The anorexia had also caused my chest to shrink, so I enhanced my curves in the drawing. I am normally a 34C.
As a result of being criminally bullied and slandered by well-known people in the sports and entertainment world, I had been starvation-dieting and over-exercising from 2011 - 2013. I was underweight through 2017, which caused amenorreha. Therefore, it is unlikely that I can ever have my own child.
The cross around my neck is also a symptom of the bullying and defamation. I am Jewish. While my family is not religious, we are proud of our Jewish Heritage. Those bullying and slandering me in pop culture call themselves Christians — but they are anti-Semitic bigots. I had been sadistically terrorized into anorexia and wearing a cross.
The continual trauma and intimidation had caused me to develop Stockholm Syndrome. Lack of proper nutrition was also hurting my mind. For some time I was unable to stand up to any of it. Fortunately, there were people who got through to me, and I did not die. Also, while I am hormonally feminine, my upbringing in York, PA made me internally tough. Therefore, I recovered, mentally and physically.
However, I had been exceptionally fertile. Slow-aging runs in my family. My mother did not start peri-menopause until her mid-50s. I was menstruating regularly in my 50s, but years of criminal bullying, traumatization, hardship, danger, stress, and low body weight caused my period to suddenly stop in 2017, with no signs of menopause.
The insecure (mentally unstable) perpetrators will continue to use their mass-market celebrity status to bully me. They will continue to believe that they are "protected" by their corrupt connections, but their arrogance is foolish.
Those who have been bullying and harassing me — those who have been hacking my phones and laptops — no matter who they are — are not "protected." They are breaking federal laws, and they will be held accountable in a court of law.
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